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No More He August 31, 2008

Posted by solrai in Love Life.
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It is official, the path that I was on, I am no longer on.

A love I thought I found, a concept and life that I was certain was destiny/heaven sent/fulfillment of prophecy has gone awry. We both believed (at one point in time) that we had to be strong together and strong in Christ so the Devil couldn’t place his wedge between us. Yet not only has a wedge been placed but a canyon. I can tell that rumors have caused my ex-fiancee to be filled with hurt and I think he has said some things to “get back at me.”

Yes, there is some sadness and confusion, yet I look forward to the events that will be forthcoming. I am ready for an investigation of my integrity and morals. Once it is proved that I have been faithful and telling the truth, once the fact that this case has been either fraudulent or a case of mistaken identity comes to light, all glory will be to God. The only thing that stirs up feelings of sadness is that we have gone past the point of no return based on the words of my ex and his proposed actions with another female.

I find it amazing that at the quickness of a heartbeat he said he would call up an area “hottie” and spend some intimate time with her. He’s kept her contact info this whole time… and we were going to walk down the aisle of life together?1? Simply amazing.

I know I am a naive girl. Always wishing and hoping for the best. Seeing the potential in everyone (most of the time). Looking for the silver lining in a dark cloud. Yet I know the peace that passes all understanding and the comfort of the Comforter will lead me through this.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; ~Proverbs 3:5

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Comments»

1. Maryann Lowry - September 5, 2008

Bless you Solrai. To experience the hurt from a partner, who you trusted, hurts beyond what words express. I’ve been there. I hope you never lose your naive spirit of believing the best in people. I just encourage to believe wisely. The description of his behavior leads me to believe that he has interests on the front burner and this leads to toxic behaviror, as you clarified in your post.
Most people, who are genuine and authentic, will thrive via the trust you put in them. Your body will tell you whether a new person in your life is the real thing. Feeling energized and loved nourishes the spirts of most people in your life. This is a gift.

It only sets you up for hurt, if your body lets you know in subtle ways that a new guy in your life may be toxic. You’ll feel your body tense, have head-aches, feel fatigued and other negative symptoms in the prescence of such a person. Most people, who are good for you, energize you and leave you feeling happy and joyful. Toxic folks have a way of transferring their own feelings of anger, anxiety, resentment onto us. Our bodies can sense this.

I wish you the best. You want a relationship to enrich someone’s life and for him to enrich your life The guy, who you refer to in the post, may be your best teacher. You’ll instantly recognize that some men aren’t good for you.

Mary Ann

2. Maryann Lowry - September 5, 2008

Let me know how I can help. I’ve been in your shoes and know the emotional turmoil.


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