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What am I doing with it? July 27, 2011

Posted by solrai in Current, Lord Help Me.
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In a downward dog position this evening I look at my thighs who are closely hugging each other.  I contemplate, “look at this body I’ve been given…what am I doing with it?”  I think about the things that have been planted inside me, the talents and gifts and I ask, “What am I doing with it… with all of them?”

In a world of uncertainty where tomorrow is a probability and not a promise, the actions and movements of today seem to demand more meaning and thought behind them.  A conscious breathing, living being, aware, awake, and engaging.  I have to admit, I have been victim to haphazard muddling around life, allowing the moment to carry me from one place to another only to look back at the end of the day and ask, “where has my day gone?”  It was given over to circumstance and strummed to the tune of another’s song; I was merely harmony, a back-up singer.

So the question plagues me again, What am I doing with this life I’ve been given???

How is my tomorrow going to be different from today?

How am I going to stand in opposition to “myself”?

How am I going to attack with a passionate fervor?

How am I going to be uncompromising to that which means the most to me?

Wish me luck!




A Spark and A Servant August 31, 2008

Posted by solrai in Current, Lord Help Me.
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Earlier today, I had the sparks of rage and anger try to ignite me. They tried to light the logs of past hurts to create a bonfire of hatred. I let it pass by preoccupying myself.

(Diversion is an awesome tool. )

In the quiet hours of the night I am reflecting on the events of recent and a shadow of sadness along with those sparks crept up again. I said to myself, “I am a servant of God.” Immediately my perspective was changed. Regardless of what decisions I made in the past to equal my present and shape my future, holding fast to the reality that I am a servant of the Most High God makes me realize that as long as I am obedient to HIM everything will be better than ok… because everything works for the good of God, to glorify God, to edify God.

All praises be to the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords.